Friday ramblings

"Wake up, little feller!" I hear Tres calling from the other room. She's playing with her dolls and stuffed animals. Where does she learn words like feller? LOL.

She's been obsessed with nightmares lately. She asked me repeatedly what a nightmare is, and for the first day or so I'd answer her by saying it was a bad or sad or scary dream, but nothing real -- just a story that your brain tells you when you sleep. Nothing that can actually hurt you. It became clear to me that explanation didn't work for her, though; she talks about nightmares as if they're tangible monsters: "Can a nightmare come in and get me in my nap time, too? Is he blue or green? Dooz he talk?" So today I switched tactics: I simply told her that nightmares aren't allowed in our house. They can't come in. I made a rule. This seems to be working much better so far; she seems relieved. I'm crossing my fingers that tonight's bedtime will go more smoothly than it did the last two nights!

She's three now, by the way, that Tres. I don't have any pictures of the festivities. For one thing, I've been insanely busy; DH's coworkers were very sweet to throw me a baby shower on the afternoon of Tres's birthday, so I had to really scramble to get the house clean and the family party ready after leaving that. I felt a little too harried and stressed to worry about digging out my tripod and camera! But more than that, even, I wanted to be present for her birthday. I don't take a lot of candids of my children because I don't know how to be both the photographer and the in-the-moment mom (can it be done?) and I'd rather be the mom for those milestones. But I'll need to start testing out the natural light in the parlor and dining room soon, so I'll see if Tres will let me take formal birthday portraits next week sometime.

She's such a sweet little kid. She's had to come to most of my doctor's appointments lately (three visits this week, wheee!) and she charms the doctor and nurses and office staff each time with her sly smile and precociously large and clear vocabulary. She got a haircut last week (mostly just a trim so we can still do fancy styles, but she insisted on bangs -- oy) and one of the nurses complimented her on it. "Fank you berry much!" Tres said. "And I like your pretty shoes." Then, "Could I have some Smarties, please? I like to be smart!" How could anybody resist that 26-lb sweet potato? She racks up the Smarties left and right at those appointments, ahtellyouwhut.

And the appointments. *SIGH!* So many doctor visits, so much time wasted on everybody's part! I understand that with three complicating factors (old lady; clotting disorder; gestational diabetes) they need to manage their legal risk by seeing and documenting my progress thoroughly. But I'm more than the sum of those three facts, and when you look at me as an individual, and this pregnancy as an individual pregnancy, it's clear that everything is FINE. Each of the growth ultrasounds has been normal. I've never had an iffy non-stress test. My blood sugar is well controlled by diet. I have no complaints, no bleeding, no clotting, no errant contractions (not even those faker-baker Braxton Hicks!), no nothing. So why all the continued fuss?

I had hoped to set an official induction date at today's appointment -- I'm 36 weeks today, just three weeks away from the vague time frame we had previously discussed -- but my OB wasn't in (her father died; so sad) and the nurses just handled the testing and sent me home. I'm so, so tired of being pregnant. Still, as slowly as each uncomfortable individual moment passes, the days seem to fly by anyway. Three weeks will be over before I know it!

How will I handle four children? Seriously! Four! What have I gotten myself into?

At least wee babies are cute. I have lots of tiny little outfits and itty bitty socks and a large inflatable duck to use as a baby bath when Cuatro gets here. These things excite me, lol.

*SIGH.*

Three weeks-ish. Yeah.


~RCH~